Today is the momentous day when we shall all learn the name for the new Snowdon summit café.

The Snowdonia National Park Authority is in the midst of demolishing the old Sir Clough Williams-Ellis-designed concrete bunker – once described by the Prince of Wales as Britain’s highest slum – to be replaced by a brand-new ‘visitor centre’.

The National Park's Llinos Angharad said: “We're looking for something short, something quite catchy, something that would be easily remembered by everyone and also something that everybody can say.” grough hasn’t tested this on its younger staff, but how about: syphilis; or gonorrhoea? No, the latter’s a bit hard to pronounce after a few pints. Pox? Or just: Unnecessary.

Other, more mainstream suggestions have included Snowdrop Café (what!? – Ed), Dragon’s Den, Summit Special, Caffe Cymylog and Coffi Cymylog (for the non-Welsh speakers among the grough fraternity, that’s Cloudy Café and Cloudy Coffee respectively.)

Give us strength!

The original summit café, at the head of the Snowdon Mountain Railway, was built in 1935 to the design of the eccentric architect of Portmeirion, beloved of fans of The Prisoner. The new building promises to give summiteers the chance to learn about the mountain environment (no irony, this is what the authority says – Ed!), weather information and refreshments. grough is sure that, whatever it’s called we’ll still be able to buy a rubber.

Worth £8.3m of anyone’s money, eh?